There are times when I can't help feeling irreparably damaged by life's experiences. Tarnished and worn in ways no polish can repair. I'm still trying to make peace with the ways I have become worn and tarnished by the elements. I'm still trying to forgive myself for decisions I've made. Maybe I'll never find a way to feel perfectly polished. Would I even want to? If I could erase the marks that life has left on me? There are lessons and bits of wisdom that I now wear on my skin; in the crinkles around my eyes; in the stubborn set of my jaw; in my very bones. Maybe, the best we can do at times is treat ourselves with care; carry our scars with grace; move forward with vigor. Yes, I am different now - my bones ache with the stories they hold. But I am fiercely proud of my scars and the lessons that come with them - the hard earned wisdom. Like waves eroding a sandstone cliff, the change is beautiful. It comes at a cost but it has made me resilient and strong and grateful.
Maybe this pummeling is life's polish even if it doesn't feel that way. Stripping away layers in rough, uneven patches to uncover what is vital underneath.
